Fargo is 14 and 1/2 today

Fargo in Lunenberg, Nova Scotia, 2008

I have thought about losing Fargo and have thought about giving him up so many times in my mind, and weeped for his loss, and mine, that you would think I’d be a master at letting go. But each time he comes around I forget that I have even lived through this sadness. The human psyche is an amazing structure! For the past two nights he has arranged himself alongside Roger, tucked into the curve of his chest and legs, and then later plastered himself up against my back, lengthwise, and I wonder how he has managed to position himself so snugly when usually it takes two or three turns before any dog can settle. He can hardly stand no less  turn and arrange himself to his liking, especially on the bed. It seems a small miracle and such a display of sweetness when I awaken and turn over to see his head stretched out on the pillow next to mine. And this is a dog who is painful and grumpy and resists my efforts to get him up and out [I know I have been known to growl when someone is trying to drag me out of bed!!!]. But I know that one day soon I WILL have to let him go and I will have to live through this whole process all over again. There is no preparation.


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